The acclaimed blow job. Otherwise known as cunnilingus, fellatio, and anilingus. Whether you’re a receiver or a giver, getting to know the penis and what it likes could elevate your sexual experiences. Here’s to the ultimate blow job and how to give one that would blow one’s mind.

The step-to-step guide on how to give the ultimate blow job

Whether you are a blow job pro, a complete beginner or somewhere in between, some may feel intimidated by giving a blowy. But no one has to be! Loveangels shares all the pro tips on how to give the ultimate blow job (and what to avoid) to make it a truly memorable and sensual experience.

Get comfortable & (t)ease into it

Unfortunately, most conventional pornos have given blow jobs, well… an unrealistic visual representation of what they are often like. The firmly erect penis and the ridiculously fast-paced sucking motion aren’t exactly everyone’s ideal blow job experience or how things go in irl (in real life).

Don’t get us wrong, everyone has their own sexual preferences and desires. But whether you’re starting with some foreplay, mixing it in during sex, or making it the main feature of the event, getting in a comfortable position as the giver, and experiencing some sensual anticipation as the receiver are the first steps to an ultimate blow job.

First things first, find a position that is comfortable for both the giver and the receiver. Especially as the giver. Getting a cramp, accidentally slipping, or sitting in a not-so-flattering position may result in a distracted giver and can potentially make the entire experience unpleasant.

The best position? Well, that’s up to you and what makes the experience pleasurable. But, one position that never fails is when the giver sits on their knees between the receiver’s legs, whether they’re standing up or lying down. Make sure that your hands are free to cup the testicles and involve some hand motion to the shaft. Giving a blow job in a comfortable position improves focus on the task at hand (or mouth) and enhances the experience for both partners.

Before getting into a comfortable position, easing into a blow job before or during sex increases anticipation and can build some sexual tension. Sensually tease them by kissing their neck, moving down their body, licking their hips, cupping the testicles, and firmly holding the shaft in your hand before your face has arrived at its destination. These are all ways to tease them (and drive them crazy!)

Make it rain & enjoy yourself

Ever heard of “the wetter, the better”? In the scenario of giving the ultimate blow job, the more spit or lube, the greater the experience is for both the receiver and the giver. Spit is the magical natural lubricant that minimises friction and adds to a mind-blowing blow job. 

Have some fun with it. Spit on the penis before or during (if that’s something they or you would enjoy). Let your saliva drip down their shaft, and don’t be afraid to let them know how “Their penis is making your mouth water”.

Don’t have enough saliva or feeling a bit parched? Don’t fret, lube is to the rescue! Water-based lubes, flavoured lubes to add sensory enjoyment for the giver, or pop some mints beforehand to get those juices flowing (and add some temperature play with a cooling sensation for the receiver).

Along with some dripping mouth action and some dirty talk sprinkled here and there, showing the receiver that you are really enjoying the experience elevates the entire blow job experience. Being enthusiastic with your hand, mouth, and body movements, sounds, and even some eye contact makes it even hotter. So, if you are not really into giving head, don’t feel obligated to give one.

It’s all in the mouth, hands, lips, and tongue

The ultimate blow job is more than just a sucking motion. Involving the mouth as well as the tongue, hands, and lips takes a blow job to a whole new level! The best way to start? Wrap your dominant hand around the penis shaft, and put your mouth over the penis making an O shape against your hand. Then, move your mouth and hand in unison up and down the shaft.

This is where you get to experiment to see what feels good for the receiver and the giver. Every penis is different and every receiver will enjoy something different. So, explore different techniques of sucking, licking, ‘flicking’ the tongue against the head, the tightness of the hand, and the rhythm of sucking.

How do you know when the receiver is enjoying it? See how their body responds. Perhaps they moan a little, grab your hair, push their hips up, or tighten their legs. And don’t be afraid to ask. You can involve some dirty talk or flirtation by asking them something along the lines of: “Do you like this? When I put my entire mouth tightly over your penis?” 

Besides focusing on the penis, use your hands to cup and play with the testicles (gently!), or use your free hand to touch the body – maybe the hips, stomach or inner thighs. Involve some more teasing by moving your mouth away and kissing their inner tights or sucking the testicles.

There is no right or wrong step-by-step process for giving a blow job. It’s all about exploring what the receiver likes and experimenting with different techniques.

To deep throat or not to deep throat

Deep-throating is when you take the entire penis down your throat and it can feel phenomenal for the receiver. (And a potential turn-on for the giver seeing the entire penis fit in their mouth.)

But one thing can make deep-throating difficult: the gag reflex. Some people’s gag reflexes are more sensitive than others and can be easily activated. So, deep-throating may be severely uncomfortable. You don’t have to deep-throat if you have a sensitive gag reflex. If you are a beginner at this type of foreplay, it may be more uncomfortable initially but may get easier after a bit of practice.

Expert tip: Every penis has a different curvature – upward, downward, or to the side. Consider the position and angle of your mouth and the penis according to the natural curvature of the penis to make deep-throating comfortable.

Swallowing isn’t a prerequisite

What to do when the receiver reaches the Big O? This is completely up to the giver and their personal preferences. If you enjoy swallowing, spitting or removing your mouth before, it’s your choice. Another option if you don’t enjoy swallowing or spitting is allowing your partner to ejaculate somewhere on your body or in a condom.

If you are comfortable with swallowing or spitting, continue stimulating the penis shaft and tip during climax for mind-blowing sensations.

Safety considerations

Blow jobs can be a spectacular experience, and like all things sex, everyone should ensure a safe and consensual sexual environment for optimal pleasure!

Keep the penis clean – Wash the penis before a blow job (or any other sexual act) to prevent bacteria from travelling to the giver’s mouth, and to ensure no unpleasant smells down there!

Use a condom during a blow job – To prevent STIs, use a condom during a blow job. You can also use a condom if you are uncomfortable with swallowing or spitting.

Don’t be a head-pusher – A complete turn-off for the giver is when the receiver pushes their head down to deep throat without consent. Always ask for consent before initiating a sexual act that you and your partner haven’t tried yet.

Avoid teeth – Chompers on the penis is a scary thought. Use your lips to cover your teeth during a blow job to ensure the teeth don’t scrape against the shaft or tip.

Final blowy thoughts

When it comes to blow jobs, almost all of those with a penis will vouch for how great it is. And many givers find it a total turn-on, too! Whether you’re a beginner, a pro, in a new relationship, are friends with benefits or long-term partners, you don’t have to feel intimidated by how to give one. Experiment with different techniques, explore what each partner enjoys and have fun with it!